Why I Wrote Big Brother

It began while I was pregnant with my daughter.

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I remember being swept up in emotion as I thought about how much life was about to change for my little boy. He was only one when I found out I was pregnant again, and just two when his sister was due to arrive. Every time I pictured him stepping into this new role, I would tear up. Pregnancy hormones certainly played their part, but mostly it was the enormity of it all.

I wanted to prepare him for this big change in the most beautiful and meaningful way I could. I searched everywhere for a book that felt special and something that would help him feel connected, excited, reassured and deeply loved. I was looking for a story that could answer the questions he didn’t know how to ask. I wanted something soft and gentle and something that honoured this moment in his life with the care it deserved.

I looked hard. I was very persistent in my search, but nothing I found felt quite right.

When I couldn’t find it, I decided to write it myself!

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1. Learning About Babies in a Sweet and Playful Way

As I thought about what would truly help him, I realised I wanted a story that didn’t just talk about becoming a big brother, but actually showed him what babies are like in a way he could understand. I wanted to create something simple and sweet, with little moments that would make him giggle while he was learning.

I wanted to create a story that made him feel included, prepared, and excited, all while keeping things light, warm and toddler friendly.

2. The teacher in me and the intention behind every word

As a teacher, I’ve seen how powerful language can be for children. The words we use don’t just tell a story, they shape how children understand their world and their place within it. I was incredibly intentional with how Big Brother and Big Sister were written with the big emotions of excitement, curiosity and uncertainty in mind. I chose gentle rhyme and figurative language to create a sense of rhythm, comfort and familiarity. Big Brother and Big Sister aren’t books to read once. They share a story that feels simple and soothing in the early days, but reveals more meaning as children get older.

The best books are not outgrown, they grow with you.

3. Written in the quietest moments

The entire book was written during those early newborn days, specifically during overnight feeds, with my baby girl in my arms.

Those hours felt slow and still and in many ways, that feeling found its way into the story. It’s one of the many reasons this book will always be incredibly close to my heart.

4. What children really need during this transition

Welcoming a new sibling is a big emotional shift, even for the most excited toddlers. Underneath it all, what they need most is reassurance to feel secure in their place, to know they are still just as important and just as loved.

Simple things can make such a difference. Including them in everyday moments and creating small pockets of one-on-one time makes them feel special. Helping them understand what to expect also brings comfort. Role playing changing nappies, being gentle, reading stories, singing and learning how to care for a baby help make the unknown feel more familiar.

And this is where books become something truly special.

Stories create quiet, uninterrupted moments between a parent and a child. Moments that feel small at the time, become something much bigger over the years. When I created Big Brother and Big Sister, I imagined those moments; the cuddles, the questions, the little conversations that happen in between the pages. It’s not just about the book, it’s about shared experiences and memories in the making.

5. What helped me in those early days

I remember hearing many times to make sure your child knows they matter just as much as the baby.

Even more, in those early days.

It is easy for everything to revolve around the newborn because it’s such a busy and overwhelming time for everyone. But, those small moments of attention, reassurance and being seen and prioritised matter so much.

I made a conscious effort to speak to my daughter about my son. I would say things like, “you are so lucky to have such a wonderful big brother” or “just wait a moment, I need to help your brother first.”

I believe these words stay with them and shape how they feel in this chapter.

And sometimes… it just takes a little imagination.

One of my favourite pages in Big Brother and Big Sister talks about parents growing extra arms like an octopus to look after everyone. In those early days, that is exactly how it can feel; busy, full, stretched in every direction, yet overflowing with love.

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It truly is the most beautiful chapter and it deserves to be honoured in a special way.